Change can be a positive life force and can create great momentum. But let's be honest, not all change happens the way we want. There are times when change happens "to" us and isn't driven by us. Sometimes it takes us by surprise and other times we can see it coming from miles away but are still helpless to avoid it. The changes we don't initiate or which are unwanted can be very challenging. What we do and how we carry ourselves through these challenging changes often defines us.
A few years ago, my husband accepted a new job which meant our family would need to move. Though I was onboard, I was reluctant. I wasn't the one initiating the change and the opportunity had taken me by surprise. My husband traveled for the first 9 months of his new job. Despite months and months to prepare, I struggled to wrap my head around the future. I languished, not making any forward progress. When we finally moved, I was still totally ill prepared for everything my new life and city had to offer. In hindsight, the transition took longer and was far more painful than needed. I'd squandered my opportunity to harness the excitement of this change.
I wish now I had done things a little differently. Are there things that can be done to make inevitable change easier? Yes, absolutely.
Orient Yourself - Recognize that once a decision is made, it's time to look forward.
Gain Clarity and Self Awareness - Clearly understand your thoughts and feelings at a personal level. Spend time thinking about both sides of your emotions, positive and negative. Create self-awareness as you look forward to what's happening.
Research -Read articles, get online and talk to trusted community members. Explore the type of change you're going through and what your post-change space will look like. Invest time and energy understanding the road ahead.
Visualize The Future - Imagine your days, how you'll spend your time, the people around you and other details. Try to clearly imagine your best possible outcomes and how they happen. Your vision may not be 100% accurate but wrapping your head around it will certainly help.
Start Making Decisions - Even if the primary change is out of your control, there are decisions that you can make that impact your personal outcome. The tiniest decisions can help create a sense of control and define personal direction.
It's all about the baby steps - putting one foot in front of the other. It's about shaking off paralysis and beginning to move in a direction. The earlier you can take some of these steps, the more prepared you'll be for your change.
If you have any other suggestions on ways to prepare for change, I would love to hear them!